We are called a narcissistic generation. Not only women, but also men do feel insecure at times. Some people show their insecurity, some don’t. We all have the same thoughts of ‘how could he/she could be so talented, pretty or handsome, skinny, smart and etc.’. We tend to compare ourselves a lot in our mind without us knowing. Did you guys know how you think about yourselves influence your behaviour?
Feelings of insecurity leave us overdependent on external factors – praise, promotions, admiration. The feeling of achievement stays temporarily. Our insecurity makes us difficult to voice out and it also leaves us dissatisfied. Many of us want to overcome it, however do each of you know what’s the root of your insecurity?
Once we have a better sense of where our insecurity comes from, we can begin to challenge it. We can start to fight our inner voices. Instead of thinking or saying:
- I can’t do that
- I’m not smart enough
- I’m not like her/him
- It’s my fault
- No one appreciates my work
- I don’t know what I’m doing
- I’m a failure
Turn those sentences into:
- I can’t do that but I’m going to try. We’ll never know the result when we haven’t tried.
- I’m not smart enough, but I’m going to give my best effort.
- I’m not like her/him. Yes, she/he is different. We all different. I have my own uniqueness that can stand out more.
- It’s my fault. I will learn from my mistakes in order for me to grow and not repeat the same mistakes.
- No one appreciates my work. It doesn’t matter. I have given my best and I’m satisfied with my own work.
- I don’t know what I’m doing, but I will finish what I’m doing and be proud with it.
- I’m a failure. No, I’m not a failure! No one can judge me. I’m wonderfully and fearfully made.
This process is not easy. Those inner voices can be uncomfortable to challenge. When you do change/challenge it, expect those inner voices to get louder, but slowly through perseverance, they will start to weaken and disappear. Whenever you notice an attack come up, stand up to it. Don’t let it to control you or bigger than you. You’re stronger than you think.
Surround yourselves with positive environment – including supporting and positive friends. And it is ok to remove some people in your life that has been affecting your insecurity. Remove those toxic, negative vibes in your life. Once you realize your own strength and importance, you are actually started to break free of the chains that hold you back. Remember, to let you go of everything that is holding you back – the hurt. Don’t waste your time for something that won’t help you to grow.
You are not alone.